my story · personal · writing

Last Dance

This is the third installment in my story. If you click the tag in the right column marked my story it will open the posts so that you may read from the beginning.

My anger brewed all through the Christmas season and I found it difficult to study for J-term (January term). Jim walked with me one night and told me Matt was coming for spring break in a few days.

“Can I go with you?” I put my hands behind my back and kept silent.

“I can’t really stop you, but you better bring someone with you. We like to move around. I’m not hanging around with you.”

I nodded. I would finally get my chance to show Matt what I thought of his playing.

The day Matt showed up, I sat on the third floor of Gestch Hall, watching the circle for his car. Rachel came over and asked me what I was doing. As I was forming an answer in my head, a red Ford Probe drove into the circle and parked right in the middle. My look betrayed me.

Rachel smiled on one side of her mouth and asked, “Is that the guy you told me about?”

I nodded, watching him emerge from his car and look around. He was as handsome as ever and I pressed my forehead against the cool glass. I knew I was blushing again.

“Well, he’s a hottie. I can see why you like him.”

We both watched as he took one small bag into another dorm.

“I need to go figure out what I’m going to wear.” I smiled, thinking of every combination of clothes I owned and mentally tossing it out, unworthy.

“I’m sure you’ll find something. Good luck.”

Good luck, what was that for? I wasn’t going to attract him, I was going to make him want me, then laugh. Wasn’t I? My heart raced, that was what I wanted, right? Now, faced with the decision of what to do. I couldn’t think. My hands shook as I went down the stairs. I had to find Marisa; she would know what to do.

I knocked on Marisa’s door and when she answered, I invited her into my room. I told her of my problem and my feelings.

Marisa looked at me, sitting uncomfortably on my roommate’s bed. “If you’re going to go through the trouble of getting ready and flirting, why would you scare him off? If you like him, take as many minutes with him as you can and enjoy them. Don’t do that playing around crap, that’s just stupid.” She crossed her arms over her chest and looked at me, waiting for my response.

“You’re right, of course. But what do I do. I’ve never done this before. What if he doesn’t really like me?”

She shrugged as she walked for the door. “What if he does?”

I tried on every single tee I owned and every pair of jeans, not that I had many. Nothing looked right, but I was running out of time. I finally decided on a Fox Racing baby doll tee with jeans. I put on my makeup with shaking fingers. This was it.

Matt drove and we went to TNT nightclub. As promised, Jim and Matt disappeared as soon as we paid the cover. I danced and hung out with a guy I brought with, but as the night wore on, I was discouraged. Jim found me a few hours later and told me they were going to move the party to Graffiti’s, a much smaller venue. Sure, whatever. I saw how this night was going to end.

Matt was nice and tried to bring me into the conversation in the car, but I wasn’t into it. He was Jim’s friend and Jim wanted to spend time with him and not with me. I’d made a fool of myself asking to go with. We got downtown and parked the car a few blocks from the club. Spring break in MN is really a challenge. You wear too little clothing and try not to freeze off anything important. My teeth chattered as I waited for the guys to pay their cover, I never had to pay cover at Graffiti’s, I think it was perpetually ladies night there.

Matt and Jim did the same at this club as they had at TNT and by 12:30, I was ready to go home. Even the guy I had come with was sick of dancing and he left to sit.

A well-built, much older man came up to me on the dance floor and grabbed my arm, he drug me back to his chair and shoved me into it. Handing me his pack of cigarettes, he said, “Don’t move. I’ll be back for the last dance.”

I was petrified. There was no way I was dancing with this giant stranger. I searched the crowd for my friends, spotting them within a few minutes. Jumping down from the stool, I left the cigarettes there for their owner and ran over to the guys.

I explained what had happened and Jim looked nonplussed. “So, dance with him.”

I looked at Matt, even though he didn’t know me at all. The last dance started and he led me right to the middle of the floor. He wrapped me in his arms and I nestled into his neck as if I belonged there. As we danced to Blackstreet’s, Don’t Leave Me, he ran the tips of his fingers up and down my back.

“Are you glad you came tonight?” he asked into my ear.

“I am now.” Did I seriously just say that? I am such a moron.

He chuckled and squeezed me closer. “Glad I could be here for you, too.”

I didn’t need to tell him that I wouldn’t have been here if he hadn’t come. I never went dancing with Jim.

The song ended far too quickly and we pulled apart, but Matt took my hand didn’t let go.

He led me back over to Jim and asked how he felt about stopping for something to eat on the way home. He nodded but said nothing. Matt draped his arm around me to keep me warm on the way back to the car. My evening was just beginning.

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